What Female Leadership Truly Looks Like (From a Young Female Leader)
- Elizabeth Joseph-Adigun
- Mar 8
- 4 min read
Written by: Elizabeth Joseph-Adigun
"Be more assertive"... "Speak louder".... "Take up space." - At this point, if leadership advice were a playlist, this would be on repeat.
For years, leadership advice has been defined through a very specific lens. A lens that has seen advice and a perspective being shaped by a model that was never designed with us in mind through many generations.
For as long as I can remember, leadership has been defined by a narrow set of traits such as 'decisiveness without softness', 'authority without vulnerability' and 'confidence without reflection'. These traits have become a standard, not because they were universally effective, but because they have always been historically dominant. Somewhere along the way, this became the blueprint.
The Realities of Being a Female Leader
Women entering leadership were often told, implicitly or explicitly, to adapt to this new found 'mould' or 'criteria':
To toughen up.
To speak like this
To act like that
To lead like them
And somehow, no one stopped to ask whether this model itself needed updating...
The irony of it all! Women are often advised to be "more assertive" in environments where they are already managing stakeholders, navigating conflict, delivering results and holding teams together emotionally. If that is not assertiveness, what is?
As some may call us 'Gen Z's', we are stereotypically seen as 'outgoing' 'unapologetic' or even sometimes 'too much/problematic'. I believe we hold these labels simply because our views on leadership today are no longer about control or who can speak the loudest in the room. It's about who can read the room? Who can make decisions under uncertainty? Who can balance people, performance and long term impact without burning everyone out? This requires judgement, emotional intelligence and adaptability and not volume!
Leadership & the Modern Workplace
Many women and female leaders still operate with a double bind:
Attribute | Reality in the Workplace |
Be collaborative | Risk being seen as weak and submissive |
Be decisive | You are intimidating and overly opinionated |
Same behaviour, different label. This is not a confidence issue, it's a classification issue.
Modern organisations face complexity in forms such as hybrid teams, diverse workforces and constant change. In these conditions, leadership styles are rooted in listening, inclusion and foresight aren't 'soft alternatives'. They're strategic necessities. Women are often socialised to develop exactly these capabilities and then told to tone them down in favour of a leadership style that hasn't aged particularly well. However, we need to understand that progress doesn't come from asking women to squeeze into outdated leadership moulds. It comes from expanding the definition of leadership as a whole!
The future of leadership doesn't require women to be more like men - it requires organisations to finally accept that leadership was never meant to look one way, we just pretended it did.
It requires women to not be overlooked and recognised from the very beginning. As a young female working in construction, many times I have felt 'overlooked'. Not because of a difference in height but more or less the difference in perception and communication.
My Story and the Lessons I Learnt
A short story time to improve the Gen Z's attention span😂
In my old office my desk was directly opposite to the entrance door! There was no possible way that I could have been missed with my huge afro being a verbal advocate for me before my face could even be seen and my face shining so bright due to all the moisturiser I applied in the morning😭.
Countless times many people have walked in and stated 'MORNING LADS' completely ignoring my existence. Luckily enough, my manager wasn't someone to tolerate such a scene right in front of him and would usually divert their attention to me by introducing my name and my role. After this repeated itself a couple times, I realised that they are not to be blamed.
Women are not seen in roles such as 'site management' and 'project management' very often. If they are coming to the office to meet with a site manager, I'm probably the last person they would assume that they would be meeting!
Hopefully after hearing this short story time, it has inspired at least one young female to realise that if you want to start change, it's not just through politics! You can start that change by following your passion and entering sectors that aren't always 'meant for you'!
My Leadership Journey
Due to my story, I became inspired to start The HerEstate Network which is a community with over 500 young females and professionals with a passion for Real Estate and other professional careers!
Within the network, these young talented females of the future are encouraged to build confidence in themselves and their future through webinars, 1-1 mentoring sessions, CV-tailoring, mock Assessment Centres and even in-person networking events!
An article I would recommend you reading if you are a young girl who is hesitant to enter ANY space and lead is my article called: "Access Is Not The Same As Inclusion!". This discusses the difference between just gaining the opportunity of being in the room and actually having a role that leads to you being involved in decisions, plans and impactful change!
Have a read of it here👇:
My Parting Message
This is a conversation I’d love to see happening more openly in leadership rooms, not just LinkedIn comment sections. Change starts from the root... be that change!
Remember: "If you want to start change, it's not just through politics! You can start by following your passion and entering sectors that aren't always 'meant for you'!"
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